So how do we actually make it work correctly?
Entering (open curly braces) coat rack (close curly braces) by itself results in "This primarily may relate to ."
Entering (ocb) coat rack (pipe) some Text ABCD (ccb) results in "This some Text ABCD primarily may relate to some Text ABCD."
Entering (ocb) coat rack (pipe) foo bar (pipe) herp derp (ccb) results in "This foo bar primarily may relate to foo bar.".
Entering (ocb) coat rack (pipe) article (pipe) details=Actual Subject Matter (ccb), which seems to be what the official guidelines recommend, results in "This article primarily may relate to article. For more details see WP:COATRACK and WP:POVFORK. Actual Subject Matter"
Entering (ocb) coat rack (pipe) article Actual Subject Matter (ccb) (thus treating it like one might an inline weblink) results in "This article Actual Subject Matter primarily may relate to article Actual Subject Matter.".
Soooooo, how does one make it so it says "This article primarily may relate to Actual Subject Matter.", which is what we actually want/need it to do? There are no instructions here or anywhere else telling us how to do this. There's enough info on how to date the entry (even though it's pointless because a bot will come along and do that for us in short order), or to add a footnote to it, but not how to make the actual main information text display in a way that doesn't make the writer look like a chump.